


One touch of your hand, and God comes rushing back.

by LadySalvatore



Series: The Unholy family [4]
Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Angst, Doomed Relationship, Extramarital Affairs, F/M, Half-Sibling Incest, Jon snow truly knows nothing, Sansa is done with him, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-05
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 02:10:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12002742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySalvatore/pseuds/LadySalvatore
Summary: She was tired of the aching in her heart every time she watched him ride away, every night she imagined him in another’s arms. She was tired of feeling stuck, of holding back waiting for the moment her King would appear on the gates of Winterfell. So she had decided enough was enough.Sansa had fought so hard to stay alive and now refused to keep only half living,





	One touch of your hand, and God comes rushing back.

Sansa’s blue eyes were trained on the landscape outside the window while the pen she was holding hovered above the piece of parchment lying on the table. The fire crackled in the hearth and casted a brilliant light into the room but all she could feel was the cold seething in her bones.

Five moons had gone by since the last time she saw her dear Jon Snow; she remembered how surprised she had been to see his horse appear on the horizon as she stood in the rooftop, her husband had gone to the Eyrie a couple of weeks prior so Jon hadn’t hesitate to sweep her into his arms and kiss her right there under the stares of Brianne and Arya. Both of them had long ago stopped pretending they didn’t know the kind of relationship she had with her half-brother.

Afterwards Jon had demanded to see her youngest son, he had yet met little Eddard and she knew there was some part of him that still doubted the child was his and not her husband’s but when Jon held the babe in his arms and saw the startling resemblance to himself every doubt flew out of the window but then the child opened his eyes and the air seemed to be struck out of him.

“I swear I’ve never been with anyone else” Sansa had whispered, half-afraid of what he could believe. Jon was never a man to be feared before but after the war with the dead something seemed to have shift inside him.

“I know you don’t sweetling” He had stroked her cheek before pulling her to him by the waist “You would never do something like that to me” His stare had moved back towards the purple eyes of the child who was now sporting a small smile as he stared up at his true father “I was just wondering…”

“About your mother?” She had asked and his eyes had shone with the melancholy that used to be so present in them before.

“Aye, father never spoke of her” Sansa had leaned down her head against his shoulder and smiled when he pressed a kiss onto her forehead.

They had spent the rest of the week fucking against every available surface on Winterfell and playing around with the children, they loved when their uncle Jon came to visit for he always brought gifts with him and would play with them day and night before telling them stories once they were on their beds.

And then he was gone once again, back to his silver haired wife in the south.

The one who shared his bed every night, who woke next to him every morning and who had the chance to share every important moment in his life the way she couldn’t. Jon hadn’t even been present in the birth of her children and if she was honest with herself Sansa couldn’t take it anymore.

She was tired of the aching in her heart every time she watched him ride away, every night she imagined him in another’s arms. She was tired of feeling stuck, not being able to move on and try giving her heart to her husband, of holding back waiting for the moment her King would appear on the gates of Winterfell.

So she had decided enough was enough.

Sansa had fought so hard to stay alive and now refused to keep only half living, because that was the way she felt whenever he was away and there was no one to blame but herself. It was true she couldn’t control the way she felt about him but she could control how much power over her he had.

Sometimes she wondered why the Gods decided to curse her with this feelings, she knew it wasn’t natural. Knew that what they were doing was a sin in the eyes of everyone and that her parents would be horrified if they could see in what she had become.

It was then she wondered if perhaps they weren’t much different from Cersei and Jamie Lannister.

It was in those moments when she decided to give him up, to end everything between them and spend the rest of her life atoning for the great sins they had committed but then he would appear again; and with one touch, one glance, one single word he would fill her heart with peace and love. The peace she longed for so much during the war.

The peace no one could provide but him.

So they would continue with their illicit affair, she would give herself to him knowing how wrong it was and how dirty it made her to allow him to touch her. To own her. She had given him everything after vowing never let another man possess her that way.

But it had been Jon, sweet Jon who loved her so she didn’t hesitate to hand him over her entire heart. Now she wanted it back, she wanted to try and love Harry, to have a happy life in the snow where thoughts of the King and Queen in the south didn’t trouble her.

So here she was, telling those exacts words to the man who had given and taken so much from her.

With a sigh Sansa wrote the final letters on the parchment and took her seal to sign it, she hoped he would understand and that the great love he claimed to have for her would allow him to set her free.

A lone tear rolled down her cheek as she folded the paper in her hand, it was time to say goodbye and no one knew how much those hurt more than her.


End file.
